.Publisher's Details: The following is the text of a character from Expedition 3 Commander Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), reviewing the occasions of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I have not composed significantly concerning specifics of this particular purpose during the month I've been actually listed below, mostly for pair of explanations: the first being actually that there has been actually incredibly little bit of opportunity to perform that sort of composing, and also considering that I'm unsure just how relaxed I am discussing ideas I provide family and friends with the rest of the globe.Effectively, certainly the globe changed today. What I state or even do is actually very minor compared to the implication of what occurred to our nation today when it was struck through ... through whom? Revolutionaries is all we know, I presume. Hard to know at whom to route our temper as well as fear ...I had simply completed a number of activities today, the most lengthy being actually the physical exams of all team members. In an exclusive conversation complying with that, the flight cosmetic surgeon told me they were actually having a quite bad time on the ground. I had no concept ...He illustrated the situation to me as absolute best he recognized it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was thrown for a loop, then frightened. My 1st idea was that this wasn't a true discussion, that I was still paying attention to some of my Tom Clancy strips. It just didn't appear possible on this incrustation in our nation. I could not even visualize the details, even before the headlines of further devastation began being available in.Vladimir came fairly quickly, sensing that one thing very severe was actually being actually reviewed. I swung Michael into the component also. They were likewise surprised as well as stunned. After our company authorized off, I attempted to discuss to Vladimir and also Michael as absolute best I can the potential enormity of this act of fear in midtown Manhattan and at the Government. They plainly comprehended as well as were really thoughtful.I eyed the World Chart on the personal computer to find where over the planet our team were as well as noticed that we were actually happening southeast away from Canada and also will be actually passing over New England in a couple of minutes. I whized around the station till I located a window that would offer me a sight of New York City as well as took hold of the local cam. It took place to become a camera, and I was actually appearing south coming from the home window of Michael's cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to have a strange bloom to it at the foundation of the column that was streaming south of the city. After checking out some of the newspaper article our company just obtained, I think our experts were actually considering NY around the time of, or even not long after, the crash of the 2nd tower. Exactly how horrendous ...I swept the electronic camera during the East Shoreline to the south to view if I could possibly find some other smoke around Washington, or anywhere else, however absolutely nothing was visible.It was fairly hard to consider work afterwards, though our experts possessed some to do, yet on the upcoming orbit our experts crossed the US more south. All 3 people were functioning a couple of cameras to make an effort to obtain sights of Nyc or even Washington. There was haze over Washington, but no details resource may be found. Everything looked extraordinary from 2 to 3 hundred kilometers away. I can not visualize the heartbreaking settings on the ground.Other than the psychological effect of our country being actually attacked and also hundreds of our people as well as perhaps some pals being actually eliminated, the best mind-boggling sensation being where I am actually is among solitude.Next day ... I suspect the tiredness as well as psychological pressure received the most effective of me. I couldn't stay awake and remain to write. Today was actually still hard, but we began getting more relevant information, plus we had the respect of talking directly along with the Center Supervisor, Roy Estess, who ensured our company that the ground staffs would certainly remain to function as well as ensure our security, and also the safe operation of the Place. Our company also learnt through our Manager, Mr. Goldin, who incorporated that the companions in the Plan are actually all completely dedicated to carrying on safe operations as well as help. These were actually never ever concerns for me. I know all these folks! The ground teams have been actually incredibly helpful, incredibly understanding of the effect of the headlines, and have actually attempted to become as helpful as possible. They have all been quite specialist and also centered though I can't envision the interruption of the kind of headlines coming in and also the notion that government buildings may be in jeopardy. They certainly never avoided a beat, also when moving nerve center. As well as a team of senior staffs and friends offered us a rather detailed briefing on what was actually understood as well as what was being done in the federal government and also at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually really useful as well as sort of them to carry out in the middle of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has also been actually helpful and handy, trying to uplink news articles when our own resources were actually inoperable, as well as pointing out kind phrases ...My crewmates have been terrific, also. They know it's been a tough day for me and the people on the ground, and they have actually tried to be as even keeled as well as beneficial as possible. Michael even repaired me my preferred Borscht soup for dinner. And they give me loads of space to assume when I needed it. They are actually very considerate and naturally shocked at whoever would certainly perform this.I recognize a lot of individuals in Washington, plenty of folks who journey to DC and NYC, so many that are actually pilots, that I felt certain I would obtain a minimum of a handful of parts of bad news over the next few times. I obtained the very first one today when I learned that the Leader of the American Airlines plane that struck the Government was Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I came across Chic throughout plebe summer season when our company remained in the D&B all together, and also our experts possessed bunches of courses all together. I can not picture what he has to of undergone, as well as right now I listen to that he may have risen even further than our experts can easily even think about through potentially stopping his aircraft coming from being actually the one to deal with the White Home. What a terrible loss, however I make certain Chic was actually battling bravely to the end. As well as rips don't flow the exact same precede ...It's hard to illustrate how it feels to be the only United States completely off the earth at a time such as this. The emotion that I need to exist along with every one of you, taking care of this, aiding in some way, is actually difficult. I recognize that our experts perform the limit (or even past) of a dreadful shift in the background of the planet. A lot of traits are going to never coincide once more after September 11, 2001. Not only for the thousands and 1000s of people straight impacted by these hideous acts of violence, yet probably for everyone. Our team will certainly locate our own selves experiencing in different ways about dozens of things, including possibly space exploration, however.It is actually horrendous to view smoke cigarettes pouring from wounds in your own nation coming from such an amazing perspective. The dichotomy of being on a space probe committed to boosting life on the earth and viewing life being actually damaged through such unforced, horrendous process is actually jolting to the subconscious, despite that you are actually. And the understanding that whatever will definitely be actually different than when our experts released by the time our company land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation and also in our management that our company will certainly carry out every little thing feasible to better guard her and our family members, and to take justice for what has been actually performed. I possess peace of mind that the great individuals at NASA will carry out whatever necessary to continue our purpose carefully as well as return our team securely at the right time. And I skip every one of you quite. I can't exist along with you face to face, and we have a very long way to go to finish our objective, however be actually certain that my heart is with you, and also know you remain in my requests.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An upgrade to the last letter ... Fortunately, it's been a busy full week up listed here. And to verify that, like our nation, our team are actually continuing our desired path along with organization customarily (as high as feasible). Tonight the current add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Compartment will certainly be introduced coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday night (US opportunity), it is going to dock with us, at a slot certainly never utilized prior to on the nadir edge of the Company Element. This brand new component will offer our team an additional place to dock a Development or Soyuz as well as will definitely offer a large airlock with 2 able to be used hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan meets, which our experts are going to carry out a few of before we get back.The issue before in handling recently was inadequate information. The complication right now is actually way too much. It came simultaneously when e-mail was actually repaired, and also there is actually not nearly enough opportunity to read everything! Plus it is actually too challenging to handle all of it simultaneously. However I cherish acquiring it, as well as I truly appreciate the fantastic letters of support and also friendship I am acquiring.Our company are actually flourishing aboard, obtaining our work performed, as well as speaking about points. Final evening our company possessed a long conversation over dinner concerning the implication of these activities, the achievable activities to adhere to, as well as what should be actually carried out. After dinner, Michael made a point of telling me that every e-mail he got from good friends in Russia mentioned specifically to inform me just how sorry they were actually that this occurred, stretching their condolences, and inquiring how I was carrying out. Vladimir showed me the Russian phrase for "acknowledgements" after talking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star Urban area. (Both the Russian and also the English terms are actually considerably extremely long to pronounce simply.) Very types individuals.For the last two times, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to send live broadcasts of broadcast updates concerning the event as well as linked tales, to ensure I was actually effectively notified. Every expert that has actually started free throw line to go over a technique or even a problem has at some point prolonged introductions to me with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom told our company that because of the wedding of remembrance in the United States, all the time individuals had been carrying florals and edging all the wall surfaces of the United States embassy in Moscow, and this evening they were igniting candlesticks in the street outside the consulate. How the planet has actually transformed.Folks everywhere seem to recognize the senselessness as well as terror in this strike. And also the significant reduction. Moscow has managed these sort of issues in the last few years along with home and train bombings, so they are actually as restless to remove this hazard as our experts are. But the bottom line is that there are actually great people everywhere that want to stay in peace. I read through that a kid talked to, "America is therefore great to other countries, our experts constantly assist every person, how can they loathe our team a great deal?".I hope the instance of collaboration and trust fund that this spacecraft and all the people in the plan show daily are going to one day inspire the rest of the globe to function the same way. They must!Sadly, our company won't be actually taking flight over the US during the time folks are actually lighting candle lights. Do not know if our team could observe that in any case. Our team carried out, however, find a quite unique and stunning attraction a handful of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz enhancer. We were actually eclipsing it as well as it appeared concerning 3 moments after its launch from Baikonur as the sunshine reached our terminal, so it was actually still at night. It appeared like a big comet along with a directly, large rear silhouetted versus the darker earth beneath. In spite of some poor lights for some time as the sun hit our home window at a low position, I dealt with some video recording of it as initially our experts passed the spacecraft, and then viewed it start to mesmerize as it gained height and also velocity. I recorded up until major engine deadline and enhancer splitting up occurred just like our team approached sunup on the Himalayas. An unforgettable view in a remarkable week ...Lifestyle takes place, even in space. Our experts are actually below to keep ... Frank.